Vegetarians

We went to the Christmas party at my wife's work the other day, and there was so much food to be had. My six-year-old was happy to eat the brownines, and chocolate chip cookies, but he didn't want to try these cookies at all:

Why? I couldn't believe he said it, but it was because they were green...so they looked like vegetables.

Kids are funny.

People Of Walmart

I was at Walmart the other day, and I saw these two walking the aisles.

I know there's that website called People of Walmart where they post pictures of all the outlandish, startling, and even downright horrifying things that people do at Walmart, but I definitely do not lump these two into that category. No, these two are quite the opposite. I think they are completely awesome.

I don't know the story behind the outfits. I did walk by them and tell them that I liked the duds, and the Dad said, "Thanks. They're jammies." I said they looked comfortable, then went on to find what I was looking for. My guess is that the kid was wearing his dinosaur jammies, and didn't want to take them off for the trip to Walmart. Maybe he asked his dad to wear them too, maybe the dad volunteered so the little guy wouldn't feel weird wearing them at Walmart. Hell, I don't know, maybe the dad wanted to wear his jammies, and begged the son to join in so it would look like it was all his idea.

All I can say is that they were having fun, and they were doing something together as a family, and it warmed my heart this Christmas season. My heart grew two sizes and all that. Hear, hear for the people of Walmart!

TGMG 215: The Crimes of Biggenrish

If you haven't seen this one yet, Rish and I did a podcast talking about the new Harry Potter...er, I mean, the Wizarding World of J.K. Rowling movie.

(EDIT: This one was on the Dunesteef Audio Fiction Magazine feed. Now that the feed is gone, the only way to hear the show is over on the Dunesteef Podcast YouTube page, which I am embedding below).

Episode 204: Bunnies Of The Apocalypse by Gregg Chamberlain

As per my goal of pimpin' the show more, here's a reminder that we put out a new episode, and you should check it out if you haven't already!

You can find it on the feed, or go to this link to listen as well. Mr. Chamberlain would love it if you did...and so would I.

(EDIT: Now that the feed is gone, the only way to hear the show is over on the Dunesteef Podcast YouTube page, which I am embedding below).

The King Of Christmas

At my work, we are one of the few places still allowed to have a holiday party for the children of the employees. My wife says it could never happen where she works, because the people without kids would complain so much that they didn't get an equal amount of money spent on them too. Of course, the answer to that complaint is ALWAYS to spend less money all around, and NEVER to spend more. But I guess people like math and how we can break things down to the lowest common denominator or something.

Oh, crap! This post is supposed to be about the king of Christmas, and not people who ruin things for other people because of envy, and instead I went off on a rant. Let me get to the point.

So, they were setting up the lobby for the party, and they got out this chair that Santa sits on during the party. Only, this is not just a chair. This thing is a freaking throne. Check it out:

I don't know why, but the sight of this thing made me think of that picture of Notorious B.I.G. with his crown:

Me and Biggy don't really have that much in common. Just the one thing really. But I saw that throne, and thought of the picture, and felt compelled to try and pose like a badass on it. A Christmas badass. I'm the motherf***ing King of Christmas y'all!

Right, right. I know. I don't look like much of a badass at all. At least I tried.

The funny thing is that they have this throne in the station all year long. It's the same throne every year for the kids' party. I wonder if the big boss is ever tempted to pull it out and sit in it during meetings or something. Good thing I'm not a big boss, because I would totally do that.

Rest Assured

You can all rest assured. It's still here, and it's still safe. Completely unbroken. It made it through another year in a box in the garage in one piece.

The spirit of Christmas lives on.

Aitch Two Oh

My daughter was thirsty the other day when we were visiting the "Specialty" grocery store, and she found this on the shelf. She wanted to buy it, but I didn't think snake oil was a healthy drink.

Seriously, hydrogen infused water?

Somebody explain to me how this can possibly be a thing? Does the H in H2O not mean anything? How did they infuse the water with hydrogen? If they put extra hydrogen in water, doesn't it stop being water? What is H3O? I know that CO2 changes substantially when it becomes simply CO.

Anyway, humans don't need crap like this. We evolved to eat and drink certain stuff, and snake oil was not one of them. There just wasn't enough snakes around to be a large part of our diet.