Friday, July 24, 2009

Murphy Brown's Law

I don't know if everybody else's life is like this, but if it isn't then why does Loki, god of mischief, hate me so?

Here's an example for you. Today, I'm heading out the door to work, and I realize that there are no leftovers for me to take for my lunch. I've got to make something, and fast. I look in the fridge, and figure that the quickest thing I can do is whip up a couple of ham and cheese sandwiches.

I grab the ham and cheese from the fridge, and the bread from the cupboard. I'm going to need some mayonnaise on these sandwiches if I want them to be edible. So, I grab a butter knife to spread it, and the mayonnaise bottle from the fridge. Except the last person who used the mayonnaise just set the lid on top instead of screwing it on. The lid pops off the mayonnaise, and the bottle plunges to the floor. When it hits, about a cup of mayonnaise splatters across the kitchen floor. So much for being quick, now I've got to get out some paper towels and scoop/wipe this mess up.

But it doesn't end there. I get the sandwiches put together, and head to the pantry to grab some Ziplok bags to put the sandwiches in. I try to pull two bags out of the box that sits on the top shelf. I get one, but in trying to get the second one out, the box falls of the shelf, hitting the ground, and spewing its contents across the floor. Now I've got about 50 Ziplok bags to clean up. I grab them all fairly quickly, but they resist being shoved back into the box. Several of them slip out of my grasp, and I've got to pick them back up. Finally I wrestle them back into the box.

I put the sandwiches in my lunchbag, and start tossing the ingredients back into their places in the cupboard and refrigerator. I'm done right? Not quite. When I toss the ham and cheese into the fridge, they dislodge a bag of shredded carrots from its perch. It falls to the floor and spills its contents too.

Is it Loki? Is it Murphy? I don't know, but it's my life.

1 comment:

  1. Leftovers or sandwiches... Yep me too. Since it is summer the wife and kids are usually still sleeping when I leave in the morning. I've had a few early morning kitchen mishaps too, but not all of them at once as you experienced.