Not Trying To Hide It

Years ago, they used to call breakfast cereals things like Sugar Smacks.

And clowns were considered fun and happy instead of terrifying. As time moved on, however, they had to hide the absolute unhealthiness of their product, so they changed them from Sugar Smacks to Honey Smacks (and swap out the frightening clown for an inoffensive cartoon frog).

Of course, honey is the exact same thing as sugar, but Americans have been tricked into thinking that it's healthy because it's naturally produced by bees instead of engineered by Dr. Mindbender in a food lab. They probably should have removed the word smack from the name too, considering what people use it for these days, but it's nice that they didn't. Then maybe people might understand just how horribly addictive this kind of food is.

Anyway, in light of that shift from honesty to hiding the truth over the last fifty years, I found it refreshing when I saw this product on the shelf at Ross while I waited in the monstrously long line.

That licorice is just called HEY SUGAR. You don't have to break through any programming to understand that it's bad for you. You know right away. Not that it will stop most people, were all so addicted to sugar that there's no stopping when you're in the clutches of a craving, but you know what you're getting at least. 

They need to label the other things we eat every day with more honest names like that as well, eh? All the sauces we buy could be called HEY INDUSTRIAL CHEMICALS and vegetables could be rebranded to HEY CARCINOGENS and ramen could be HEY DIABETES and pasta could be HEY OBESITY!

It would be fun, huh?