Saturday, October 31, 2020

Happy Halloween

I expected that there would be no Halloween of any kind this year, to tell you the truth. There were all kinds of ominous signs that portended a sad outcome Halloween-wise this year. 

Before September even arrived, the Houston mayor said we ought not to celebrate the holiday, and our time would be better spent huddling in our basements waiting for the end to come. 

The news was filled with experts telling us to stay home and commemorate the holiday with a different kind of celebration. Why not have an Easter egg hunt instead? Or what about a scavenger hunt inside your home with your own kids and no one else's present? Or why not try putting on your costumes and marching around the neighborhood in a parade...but by yourself without any other kids, and not stopping at any of the houses to collect any of the free candy they were giving out? Or, the best suggestion that I heard all month, why not just gather the family around the table and celebrate the season by planning out all the fun things you could do next Halloween?


Costco put out their Halloween costumes on the last week of July (as they do every year). Usually, they disappear faster than bacon slices on my breakfast plate, but this year they mostly remained unpurchased as we moved into August, then September, and even October. There was still a bunch of them left on the actual day of Halloween this year, and I've never seen them even make it to October first.

To me, all this meant that we'd be sitting at home Halloween night, wishing there was something we could do to have fun like we did last year, but being unable to do so. I kept waiting for a government official to drop the hammer, to come out and officially ban the holiday like he was the Burgermeister Meisterburger or something, but even if they never did, would any people be willing to celebrate? If we went out trick-or-treating, would they have candy to distribute or would they just come out yelling at us for putting their lives in jeopardy by knocking on their door? My plan was just to sit and wait for the time to arrive, and if we saw kids in the street, we would join them.

My wife thought she would invite some friends over to hang out with us, but when she called them, they turned the tables on us and invited us over instead. They had already made some plans, but were willing to include us in them. They have a daughter that is my son's age, and the two of them get along really well, so they could trick-or-treat together, while us adults stayed at the house and distributed the candy to anyone brave enough to venture out.

We went out shopping to grab some kind of dessert to bring to the party with us (as well as groceries for this week), and found that the stores were packed. Walmart was mobbed, especially the costume area. It seemed as though a lot of people were looking for last minute costumes. I think a lot people were like me, expecting Halloween to be banned, and now it had arrived, they weren't prepared, but they realized they couldn't just do nothing. So they ran out like last-minute Christmas shoppers in search of holly, mistletoe, and good cheer; but grabbing all the skeletons, gory makeup, and moldering zombie limbs that they could instead.

We needed a wig to complete my son's mad scientist costume. We'd been unable to find one before, and now that the stores were ransacked, we found even less selection. On Friday, when he went to school in his costume, we just had to spike his hair up with gel. A little less effective than we'd hoped. 

While he was at school in his costume, he also lost his safety goggles, so his costume was a little more lacking. We had to do something. We found a beard that, with some bobby pins might be pulled into shape. It was only three bucks, so we bought it. When we got home, my wife went to work, and turned it into something that looked pretty decent. She added some black makeup to his face, to make it look like an explosion had gone off in his face, and he looked...well, not his best costume, but not too shabby either.

My daughter invited her best friend over to watch horror movies at our house, so we tasked her with handing out our candy.

We went over to our friends' house, and while we waited for their oldest daughter to get home from work and take out the kids to trick-or-treat, I decided to do a street or two with Simon. My fears were totally unfounded. The street was full of kids. And while a lot more houses than usual were dark to warn kids that trick-or-treaters weren't being served there, there were still plenty that were open and inviting. Most people had set up tables outside to set their candy on, and were sitting out wishing everyone a happy Halloween. It was pretty nice.

In the end, my son got a pretty normal Halloween. I know plenty of kids that didn't. His best friend went camping with his family instead. Another friend he plays with often probably sat down with his family to plan all the fun things they could do next year. But my son got to trick-or-treat like he does every year, and he came home with a whole bunch of candy too.

With my older kids, we always had a competition to see who could get the most candy. We would weigh it at the end of the night, and declare someone the winner. Now, those kids are too old to trick-or-treat.

We still weigh the candy, but we can only compare it year to year instead. Last year, his candy haul weighed in at a family record of 6 lbs. 7.5 ozs. This year?

He had so much, it kept falling out of the bowl, and we had a really hard time getting it all to remain in place long enough for the scale to tell us how much he brought home.

But, he managed 6 lbs. 7.4 ozs. That's right, one tenth of an ounce less than last year's record. I don't think you can call that anything other than a good day. It was a Halloween miracle, instead of a nightmare before Christmas. I suppose 2020 hasn't been all bad.

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